Don’t let your past-times become your everything.

I feel like I need to start out by defending my title. I don’t mean the hobbies that make you giddy. I mean the things you do because of peer pressure. The things that you do because everyone else wants you to.  I said I’d give an update on how I was doing now that I’m home alone for several weeks, and here it is.

If you’ve become so focused on doing things that other people want you to do you are probably going to become unhappy because it pulls you away from the things that make you YOU.

Now, I can tell you that my biggest issue with this is the video games that I play with my husband and friends. Do I enjoy playing the game? Sure. Should I get on every night and dump hours into it when I could be doing something more, arguably enjoyable, with my time? Probably not.

And yet, I stay on for hours because people want me to play. They want me to hang out with them. And I love the people I play with. But when I start shirking other things I want to do I wonder if it isn’t negatively impacting everything I do. I think it is because I start thinking about hanging out with them. About playing the game in the middle of the day when I should be working.

How do you navigate wanting to spend genuine time with your friends versus putting way too much time into something that isn’t going to make me a better person or benefit me in the long run?

I seriously asking because I have no idea. I was thinking about this last night when I was crawling into bed way too late because I’d stayed up past when I knew I should because people who have different work hours than me were still playing.

Maybe I just need to tell my friends that I can only be on for certain hours during the weekday?

There are days when it feels like I’ve spent more time with them than work. I know it isn’t true, but it feels that way, and for some reason, it makes me super guilty.

I feel like most people got this stuff figured out in high school and college. “How to Properly Manage Your Free Time 101”, but I must have missed that class because I’m getting a crash course in it now.

The time I’ve spent with other friends outside of evening working hours has been great, and I get home feeling like I’ve done something meaningful with my time. It might be the lack of face to face contact that makes me think it isn’t meaningful.

I’m going to try and not get on tonight, or just be on an allotted amount of time. We’ll see. Like I said, it isn’t cutting into my work, but I think it is affecting my ability to really focus, and as scatterbrained as I am I need all the help I can get.

 

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One thought on “Don’t let your past-times become your everything.

  1. Maybe your time management class was taught by individuals who are not able to manage their own time. I am throwing myself under the bus. With all the things I have to do, it is so much easier to lay on the couch with Willy.
    Guilt? Absolutely, but guess what? Tonight will be the same.

    Dad

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